Trust me when I say I have no idea what to say in this page. Ok here I go…
I’m currently living in Singapore and for the past 19 years in my life, I have been. Currently studying in Republic Polytechnic that is at Woodlands, north of Singapore.
I’m not exactly a free spirit but neither I’m a down to earth type of person. I just enjoy being who I am and don’t really intend to change much of my attitude towards my life. But to say, I have a lot of doubts. And to say a lot, I mean so much that it consumes me so much that sometimes it takes me time to think about things a lot.
I’ve been told that my bluntness are like knife cuts, stubborn like a clam shell, too straight-forward that people will think that I’m rude, that I have the look that people think I intentionally intimidate them, that I’m a bitch because I’m too direct, I’m fierce and hard to communicate with. I can’t really disagree with most of the bad description of me but sometimes I also think they are what bring me to be me and that they are my strengths instead of my weaknesses. 🙂 I don’t intentionally do things to hurt people but its just that I have the thing that I don’t lie about things and cuddle people with soft cushion (because to me sometimes it like lying in their face and I hate lying).
Ok I admit that I do lie sometimes so that I can cuddle MYSELF with soft cushion… But of course I’m changing it so that I will not let it be my crutch anymore.
I also have a habit where I don’t pretend to be a different person when in different situation. Like if I’m just not happy, I’m not happy and I would definitely not lie and picture myself otherwise. If I’m not happy, I will just be quiet and not talk and listen to songs and I’ll just be unhappy and not laugh, smile or talk. It’s not that I want people around me to be uncomfortable but yes, I don’t pretend to be happy when I’m not happy.
Ok now, let’s stop talking about depressing things and move on to more lighter topic! 🙂
I’m also a sotong (blur queen) to my friends because I’m constantly confused about things and react slowly… But that does not mean I’m stupid! I hope I’m not! I don’t think I am! I think I’m fairly smart to say but I also know that I have a lot of things to learn as well. Sometimes I act like sotong so that my friends would be happy because they laughing makes me happy as well.
I’m a keen learner, I love to learn new things, explore new things. That’s why I read a lot as well, ok not so much like a friend of mine but I believe I read a lot compared to most. But yes I love reading and exploring new places and things.
But of course everyone have passion in one place that they can’t move on from, for me its design and especially fashion. I love designing clothes because I’ve always envision myself as a designer since young but never did I take the chance to cultivate my skills because of disapproval by my parents and family. But since I’m old enough now, I’m charging myself towards my goal and working as hard as I can while also blogging.
For now, I know it’s not about pleasing others but instead to please yourself and love the very moment you are having. You can please everyone all your life but you can never really be happy unless you yourself be please about yourself and stop seeing yourself in other people’s eyes. So I’m working towards my goal and to motivate myself towards a better myself – if that makes sense. And no matter the set-backs, no matter the number of people talking behind my backs, no matter how many heart broke I have, no matter how many times I cried alone, I know that I will move forward and not cowardly sit in my shell. That’s what I told myself at least!
Ok… Actually there is a lot of things to talk about huh? Hehehehe… 🙂